FKA Twigs has opened up a bit more about her relationship with her ex-boyfriend, Shia LaBeouf. The singer had filed a lawsuit a month ago against the actor as she further expands her claims.
She accused Shia of “relentless abuse” during their nine-month relationship. The singer opened up on the Grounded with Louis Theroux podcast and discussed why she decided to publicly speak about the experience.
FKA Twigs said it is something in society that is a really “big” problem and it is common but for some reason, people don’t talk about it that often. She said, “It is something in society that’s a really big problem, and it’s really common, but for some reason, we don’t talk about it.”
The singer further described the initial moments of their relationship as an “intense honeymoon period”. She shared how that is a signifier of how brilliant things can be moving forward. The songwriter further said it sets the benchmark if people behave well.
FKA explained if you fulfil all of the requirements and meet the rules, it can be great. She said, “It sets the benchmark for if you behave well and if you fulfill all of the requirements and meet the rules, and all these things of the abuser, it can…be great.”
The former couple had met back on the set of Shia’s semi-autobiographical film, Honey Boy. They both had been a part of the movie and they started seeing each other in 2018. She shared how the actor showed “big displays of affections” initially which is a claim that is also included in her lawsuit.
“That was my reality for a good four months…that I wasn’t allowed to look men in the eye.”
The singer explained how it felt like all of that was him grooming her and pushing her of her emotional and spiritual boundaries. However, she revealed after the happy times were over the actor started becoming jealous and controlling.
FKA further explained how she noticed that little things one could do wrong could take away from the happiness. She also claimed that the most silly things could instantly invoke a reaction from the actor.
The songwriter explained, “For me, it was being nice to a waiter or being polite to somebody that could be seen as me flirting or wanting to engage in some sort of relationship with somebody else, when I’m literally just ordering pasta.” She further shared she was told that she knew what he was like and if she loved him, she would not look men in the eye.
FKA Twigs said, “That was my reality for a good four months…that I wasn’t allowed to look men in the eye.” The singer further alleged that the actor would count how many times a day she kissed him. She also made the same claim in her lawsuit as well.
The songwriter explained that Shia had a “quota” over the matter and would change if after the amount was met. She did not specify how many amount decreased or increased. The singer shared that it was like touches or looks or kisses and she never knew what the “right number” was.
“His previous partner apparently met this number very well,” she shared, without specifying who she was referring to, “so I was inadequate compared to a previous partner of his.”
“I felt so controlled and I felt so confused..”
The singer explained that if she did not meet the actor’s requirements, he would start an argument with her and berate her for hours. She claimed he would also make her feel the like worst person ever. The songwriter shared how in those moments she felt like a “terrible girlfriend”. She further mentioned that he would allegedly call her ex-boyfriends to ask if she was a good lover.
“Any sort of pleasant day-to-day interaction could result in a three-day event of me being berated and kept awake,” she recalled. “I think, for me, I started to really isolate myself. So, I stopped talking to my friends. I didn’t talk to my family. I just was living a very regimented and contained life that I felt got me in the least trouble.”
FKA Twigs shared how controlled, confused, and low she felt. She shared, “I felt so controlled and I felt so confused and I felt so low, beneath myself that the fear of leaving and knowing I had all this work to do to get back to just feeling OK, it was completely overwhelming”.
The singer revealed the moment she received a massive wake up call which enabled her to start healing and move on from her relationship. She also claimed that as the former couple was returning from a trip, the actor was threatening to crash the car unless she told him she loved him.
She said he “ended up basically strangling me in public at a gas station and nobody did anything. That was a really low moment for me because I felt like I would never be believed.”
“But I can do it. I’m a big girl and I can do it.”
However, after the incident, the singer said she called a free helpline for women who have been abused. She felt validated over the phone and that is when it struck her and that was a “massive wake-up call”. The musician hopes that her story can do the same for others as she received help at the time.
“All I can do is just think about myself when I’m 50 years old [and] I’ve got kids,” she expressed, “I think about what I want to have stood for. This is something that was completely unexpected. I never thought something like this would happen to me…When I’m older, if I have a daughter, I want to be able to say, ‘This thing happened to me. And I dealt with it.'”
FKA Twigs further explained how the situation is not about Shia or her anymore. She shard that she is doing this for something that is much bigger. The singer explained she wants to change the conversation and stigma around domestic abuse. She shared that she has definitely healed after a point where she can put her experience into something positive to try and help other people.
The musician shared that it is all she wants and that it is a big thing to heal publicly and having to do that in front of people. She said, “but I can do it. I’m a big girl and I can do it.”
“I owe these women the opportunity to air their statements publicly”
Although Shia has not commented on the singer’s latest interview, his lawyer said that; he is actively “seeking the kind of meaningful, intensive, long-term inpatient treatment that he desperately needs”. After the lawsuit was filed against the actor, he issued a statement; and said he was a sober member of a 12-step program and is committed to recovery.
“Although many of these allegations are not true. I am not in the position to defend any of my actions,” he said at the time. “I owe these women the opportunity to air their statements publicly and accept accountability for those things I have done. As someone in recovery, I have to face almost daily reminders of things I did say and do when I was drinking.”
Shia said it has always been easy for him to accept responsibility when his behavior reflects poorly on himself. He explained that it is much harder to accept the knowledge; that he may have caused great pain to other people. The actor said he cannot change the history and can only accept it and work to be better. He said, “I am not cured of my PTSD and alcoholism; but I am committed to doing what I need to do to recover; and I will forever be sorry to the people that I may have harmed along the way.”